Wow. Just... Wow.

Okay, so my lunch break rolls around and today I decide to go to this grocery store that's right across the street from where I work. I was going to buy some cereal and maybe some sort of side dish for dinner tonight. Now, I know that I don't exactly work in the greatest neighborhood anyway, but the name: "Save Alot" (one word for "a lot") should have given it away. As you enter the store, you come to metal gates that have a sign saying you have to surrender any bags or personnel items due to theft problems. There is no way I'm handing over a coach purse.... the only "nice" thing I have besides my wedding ring to a crusty one eyed sales lady with a skin rash. So I just went through the gates-- thankfully hassle free.I went down most of the aisles and really, they had NOTHING that could be a good side-- except for rice (which we have already had this week) and mac and cheese. (I am a firm believer in mac and cheese as a side dish and NOT the main course) and so that's what I grabbed and went to look for my cereal. They didn't have Cheerios... okay. So I decided to just skip this part altogether. Too much stress. I do want to take a moment to mention their impressive selection of flavors, sizes, and assortment of honey buns and wrapped muffin pastries. Anyway, so I took my lone box of Mac and Cheese to the skin rash woman to check out and she says to me:"Reckon by the looks of it, the kids is hungry."What do you say to that? "I don't have kids?""If I had kids I would feed them.""The proper way to say that sentence doesn't have the word "is" in it?"In the end I decided that it was best not to turn this into a conversation and simply said:"Chompin' at the bit they is."She looked at me a little funny, so I don't know if I got my redneck crossed with my Brit accent a little or something, but I just took my artery clogging crap and my coach bag and got the hell out of there before I developed some kind of rash myself.