Saturday, June 30, 2007

People Watching. Its a Sport.

So I have had the chance to view some interesting personalities lately. Meh, lets not beat around the bush here, I'm going to make fun of them. So if you're reading this and its you're great aunt Gert or something, sorry.

Scenario A: Have you ever seen those mini-vans or SUVs with the little stickers on the back? They say the kids name and have a little graphic for their sport. Maybe its a Florida thing. For example, there will be one of those cheerleading bullhorn graphics and the name Amber. Well, I was going to pick up a perscription and pulled up next to an enormous utlity vehicle that boasted said stickers proudly on the back. One for each of the three kids.
Shannon had a ballerina silohuette. Evan had gymnastics.... O-kay. Let's face it. Evan's going to be a fashion designer when he grows up. Last but not least, Jackson had some sticker that had a horse on it and I wasn't really sure what it was. Turns out, Jackson is into polo! Polo?! What kid plays polo?! What family has ballerinas, gymnasts and polo--...ists. It just seems like too much joy for one household. Can you imagine the conversations around the dinner table?

Scenario B: Pet lovers? I love my dogs-- probably more than the average person loves their pet. I have pictures of them littered all over my website. They are endlessly spoiled and as far as I am concerned, well deserving! I got up early today and dragged my husband along for a trip to Pawmosa Park where they were having a "pug meetup." It was really boring. A bunch of middle aged people akwardly standing about while their pugs played with other roly poly pugs. So do I spoil my dogs? Yes. Today however, I saw the most disgusting people on earth. They rolled up to this pug meetup in their convertible... dropped the top and then the show began. The man of the outfit got out of the car with slicked hair and sunglasses. He was wearing long dress pants and a polo and even dress shoes (um, dog park? Hello?) and was proceeding to pull a nauseatingly pink stroller out of the back of the car. But it was no regular stroller. It was for the dog!... Who was also dressed to the nines by the way. They put together the stroller/cart and placed the pug carefully into the bed and unzipped his window. They wheeled their dog the whole two feet from the car to the gate. I'm serious. They put together a pink doggie carriage to wheel their dog TWO FEET. But the gut renching doesn't stop there. As they entered the park they were each carrying large sports bottles as if they were going to jog, but you already know what the gentleman was wearing...
... his lady friend? She was wearing a black wash cloth that appeared to have been washed thousands of times stretched across her enormous stumpy, cottage cheese legs. It was uncomfortably short... as in I'm going to have nightmares tonight. It was really gross.
I think the dog was the most likeable character in the family...

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