Monday, October 22, 2007

World's Worst Job Interview

I am a person who gets nervous when I get mail from an address that I don't recognize, yet somehow, the prospect of going on a life-altering job interview doesn't phase me at all. I have never been nervous. I don't worry about them, I just go in there with what I've got, assume its deserving of a high paying salary and then continue on with my day. If I get it, great, if not, oh well. That's always been my amazingly non-Jennyesque attitude on the subject. I'm hoping my experience today doesn't change this---
Being new to Austin, and quite frankly, new to their crazy ass road system, I gave myself an extra half hour to arrive at my interview. How did I end up 40 minutes late? Well, that started a short while after I got on I-35 and realized that exit 250 (State Road 1325) didn't exist. It all went downhill from there. I had to call them twice to tell them I was lost and if it hadn't been for the peppy secretary's "can-do" attitude, I probably would have quit after the thirty minute mark. Needless to say, looking like a grand ol' tard, I made it there 40 minutes late. Naturally everyone assured me that it was no problem and they were so sorry I was lost but I'm pretty sure that deep down they were wondering if I was going to be able to turn on a computer if they hired me.
Visibly shaken by my near two hour Texas excursion, we sat down to begin the actual interview which started with a conversation that pretty much promised that there wasn't the slightest chance in the farthest corner of hell that I would get this job. The lady that interviewed me said: "Well, we've just been so excited to meet you. Denise is one of our favorite gals and she's just certain that you'll be perfect for this position!"

Huh? Who in the crap is Denise?

While I tried to politely say just that, it must have been clear by the look on my face that I had no clue what she was talking about because the lady went on to say:

"Oh... you are Denise Smith's friend, right? You know Denise?"

Me: "Uhhhhh... no. I'm sorry."

Yep, I apologized for not knowing Denise. So from that point on, things continued like any other interview, but I'm pretty sure that Denise's friend is probably the one getting this job. Hopefully she'll show up on time. Best of luck to her. If you need me, I'll be watching daytime television.

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