Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Sabotaging Your Own Love

I don't care if you're Mother Theresa, the moment you get on the road, in your little car, everyone is the enemy. You hate everyone simply for existing. There isn't a single other car on the road that is really a good driver. They're going too fast, too slow, you catch them trimming their toenails with no hands or feet on the wheel, they can't use a cell phone and manuever a turn, whatever. You know you hate them. We all hate them. So logically speaking, KNOWING that you hate everyone on the road, it stands to reason that everyone on the road hates you. That said, why would you choose this medium to advertise your cause. How many times have you seen some idiot causing minor gridlock in the passing lane and scoffed to yourself: "Ha, an Obama fan. Figures."
You're not scoring any points for things you stand for when you advertise on your car. Even people I agree with that irritate me on the road, leave me reevaluating my own system of beliefs. Worse yet, the people who raise my blood pressure the most are out there with their: "I'd rather be shooting a deer in the face" bumper stickers and their metal scrotum hanging from the back hitch and that makes me hate hunters and neanderthals THAT MUCH MORE.
So, the moral of the story is, the next time you think its a good idea to Free Tibet, maybe buy a t-shirt or something. Because when you cut me off on I-35 it makes me think that maybe Tibet can kiss my ass too. And the world... can be a better place...

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