Saturday, June 2, 2007

I Spent $60 so Shave His Ass and Cut Down the Trees.

My faith in humanity was restored last weekend at Disney's Animal Kingdom when a British man screamed in the face of a handicapped guide person. It was about ninety degrees and humid so there weren't very many animals out which did kind of suck, but I supposed if you're dumb enough to go there on such a day, that's what you get. I'm in my mid twenties now and this is one of my first encounters with anything "Disney" related despite living in Orlando, and I have to say, I was less than impressed but this man had far surpassed "not impressed" and was venturing into the fanatical. He shouted that he spent sixty dollars (well, sixty three for you non florida residents to be precise) and expected to see some damn animals! He then continued to scream that if Disney is going to have a park called "Animal Kingdom" it should have no "bushes or trees" for animals to hide in and in order to keep them protected from the heat and blazing sun (one of, I'm sure, many reasons they are hiding in the first place) they should all be shaved.At that point my guilt that I was even there could only be shadowed by the Simpsonesque aroma of roasted, baked, grilled, and otherwise cooked animals being served at all the street vendors.NOT that I'm saying that I'm a vegetarian or Vegan because God knows I don' t have that kind of will power and I'll take a burger over a salad nine out of ten times, but nothing can make you feel worse about it. Fortunately my mom bought us a hotdog so I knew I wasn't eating any animals just old boots and tin cans.All right kiddys. I'm going home now. Who the hell wants to be at work on a Sunday anyway.

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