Saturday, June 2, 2007

Too cool for School... or pants...

Okay, I think my mood officially started deteriorating last night. Lets do the math:JenNY + morning workouT + evening workouT - Sleep + work at HarcOurt = SNOTTYIf you know anything about math though, its never that simple. See, I was okay until arriving at the gym for my evening workout. First off, its a monday, so its packed and we have a HUGE locker room but everyone seemed to want to be in the very same area as me. I can't fault people for that. I would want to be around me too. But it was a little annoying. Annoying continued as there were people everyfreakingwhere. Yes, that's a word. I managed to finish my workout-- almost. On the last machine that I had to use there is this old couple having a conversation. I tried to be patient but after several minutes of nothing I finally said: "Excuse me, are you using this machine?" The woman laughed and said "no!" Of course not. What was I thinking. She was using it as a lounger to have a conversation with some old guy about raisins. So they finally left and I finished my workout and went over to the treadmill to do cardio. I don't know whether I just smell freaking wonderful or what, but by this time, the gym had cleared out and there were about 500 empty treadmills in my row but this skinny blonde (everyone's favorite) decides she's going to use the one right by me. Usually this is annoying because I feel like a big brunetteasaurus rex pounding and grunting along next to such person, however, she didn't want to work out either. She wanted to talk on the cell phone... RIGHT NEXT TO ME. Why? Don't you think that's a little akward. She was just leaning on the treadmill bitching about "Sarah" for 20 minutes and then left. O-kay.... thanks for that. I need to be somewhat spaced out on the treadmill or I will dwell on my discomfort and the fact that I could be eating some juicy cheeseburger at that very moment. Its okay though, I watched the Simpsons. It helped.Well, I was starting to feel my bloodpressure come down a little and went to take a shower. Of course every shower is in use except the one that was previously used by the rare and endangered crazy water weasle. A strange species, this is usually a confused and derranged housewife that manages to soak everything she encounters with water. So I figured, what the hell, I'm going home anyway. So clothes get a little wet. Oh well. Its just the point that the whole shelf was dilluted. What kind of nutcase are you and how does that happen? So I am taking my relaxing shower and all of a sudden there is a blood curdling scream:"MMMMMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM"The screaming continues until it is no longer the word mom, but more like series of gurgling shrieks. When I step out of the shower, I realize that the screams are coming from a pantsless little boy. Women's locker room.... perfect place for a nine year old with no pants. After that I was ready to go and as far as I know Nudey McGee over there never found his mom or his pants.I don't know anyone else who has stories like this. I seriously wonder why its always me. On another note, I am starting classes again today (why yes, at another college. Why yes, I am going for a world record.) So I am hoping things go better today than yesterday. Its not looking very promising, though, as I slept little last night what with all the 1:00am phone calls that turned out to be the wrong number, the fact that I missed my morning workout and last but not least, an overturned semi had me stuck in traffic for hours. Eh. I'm probably too cool for school anyway. That's why all those people want to sit by me in the locker room. I think tomorrow when I go, I'm going to scream for my mom and run on the treadmill pantsless.

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